Hating me to Loving Me

Let’s travel back in time just a little ways… all the way back to October 2017…
I took a selfie with my hair all splayed out on my silver duvet cover…
The sunlight was just perfect, my eyes were clear and bright, and I was observing just how incredible I felt looking at 10 months of growth of my hair… (photo below)

This was some of my happiest moments letting my hair grow out natural and messing with people’s head’s and their projections and expectations while I did it!
Like how UNREASONABLE I was to let my hair go natural! LOL

People would say… “Lorene, don’t you think it’s time to dye your hair yet?”
and I would reply… “Nah I’m thrilled my sparkles are coming out to shine and be seen!”

Or… “Don’t you think having grey hairs will make you look old?”
my reply… “Nah, age is an inside job! And I still feel 30!”

Or… “Aren’t you worried what your man will think?”
my reply… “Hahaha, if he can’t accept me and my sparkles then he doesn’t deserve to be in my life!”

However all this back and forth often made me contemplate all the times in my life previous to this where I had bent and buckled to other people’s comments and criticisms…
Which of course were just a reflection of how I felt about myself at that time… :-/

And then how I had been that with my own Mum… 😦
Sorry Mum for that comment when I was 18years old saying that letting your hair grow out made you look old… That was super mean and uncaring! Not Cool Jan!
Please know that in saying that to you, I also judged myself for YEARS for having grey hairs popping out of my own head…

Now I LOVE them!
Especially my streaks that are at my temples…
I used to really get angry with them cause they NEVER took dye well… Now they are one of my most treasured features 🙂

We all make mistakes in things we say when we are functioning from our own ‘hurt space’.

At that time, when I was 18 years old, I was going through a lot of adjustments and emotional and physical shifts and changes, and sadly I didn’t want to admit that others were going through their own changes.

I thought and assumed that they should be and look just how I left them…

Very naive I know… I was 18 and experiencing teeny tiny fishy in a massive ocean syndrome… and it was not pleasant…

I was looking for familiarity and home and sameness, and I didn’t find it that day… and I was angry…

Again, I’m sorry Mum… Kids and adults say bloody dumb shit when they are struggling and stressed. It doesn’t make it ok by any means…

I had sort of left my small home town in rural New Zealand, gone half an island away to the massive Wellington area to further my education as an architectural draftsman. I was struggling horribly with homesickness and loneliness, all the people, and new rules, and no rules, and all the people, and having to make new friends, and all the people, and learning how to live with a bunch of strangers, and did I mention… all the freaking PEOPLE!

I missed the stability of home, and work, and high school. I missed knowing exactly where everything was. I hated feeling so bloody alone even though I was surrounded by so many others. I was painfully shy and not sure how to express myself…

I was shit scared of rejection and being labelled as a freak/geek/weirdo/nerd (again)

I found myself observing a lot, not saying a lot, till I found my peeps, THEN they couldn’t shut me up! LOL
I constantly would be interrupting them with “Ohhh that reminds me of…..” or “That’s like the time I……”
I was so desperate to prove that I wasn’t a looser, that I could be a good friend, please don’t leave me, cause I really am trying to connect with you in the best way I know how… (with verbal diarrhea…) whoops :-/

Luckily I did manage to find a couple of very patient people… maybe they were just as scared as me, who knows… but we did create a friendship… one of whom is still a friend today! How did I get so lucky?

Fast forward to Oct 2021… and it’s 25 years since that crappy comment to my Mum…

I’ve done and created so much awesomeness in my world, and been through some pretty challenging things too…

Those rejection trigger points are a lot less these days…
Making close friends is still a work in progress… I do have a lot more allowance for the fluidity of friendship these days, and don’t hold on so damn tight… Some of the strongest friendships I have we speak only a few times a year, but when we do, it’s from that deep heart space without the “small talk” that I don’t do well with…

Unless it’s the weather, man I could talk about that till the cows come home!!!

It’s amazing how much clarity you can have 25 years, and LOADS of inner healing, later 😉

I have had by far waaaaaaaaay more complements about my hair (once it was all completely natural) than I ever had when it was being dyed every 3 weeks!

The sparkles won!!! and they love being adored and acknowledged!

It’s crazy how a choice made at Christmas 2016 to listen to and honour my body and when she demanded no more hair dye! Just how much that one little choice has changed so much in my world…

My allowance of my body has grown, my ability to receive has grown, my gifts talents and abilities have increased, my friend circles have changed and become freaking AWESOME, my willingness to stand up for myself and have my own back has exponentialized, my willingness to have and acknowledge my own desires and dreams has increased dramatically, and my knowing of what’s true for me no matter how loud anyone else is, is now paramount in my world.

One little choice that lead onto many other little and big choices, and a whole heap of brutal honesty and inner healing. Getting rid of and letting go of so much anger, rage, disappointment, despair, grief, sadness, points of views, projections and expectations, and control…
and then embracing the soft side of me, the vulnerable side, the grateful side, the fun side, the sexy side, the feminine and goddess within, the side with hopes and dreams and goals, and continuing to use and be grateful for my strength, my tenacity, my stubbornness, my work ethic, and my creativity… instead of judging any or all of the above.

So I’m curious…
What do you have about you that you’ve hated or judged tremendously before that now you don’t???
I learnt how to #BeBoldBeBraveBeMe Are you willing to #BeBoldBeBraveBeYou?

10 months growth ~ Oct 2017

Releasing The Burden of Kids Supporting the Parents Emotions

For every one of my friends who’s parent leaned too heavily on them as kids to be the adult and support the parent… This is for you…

This morning I awoke to hear Kelly Clarkson’s song “Because of You” in my head…
When these things pop in I have learnt to take special note, as these are generally a vehicle by which awareness and messages are flowing through to me…
This one tapped into an especially deep place of grief and healing for me…
And also a space that I am now able to acknowledge just how far I’ve come from that.
So it is with a light and gratitude filled heart I share my download with you now…

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Every Delicious Step a Goddess Takes COUNTS

This my friends is the face and body of a goddess taking care of herself… Workout done… We’ve reduced in size in just 12 days by 4.4kg! Still a wee ways from out target, but we are getting there!

This journey began back around 2.5 months ago when I stopped eating after 8pm. I could still have my herbal teas but no food or honey etc…
Then a month later (start of June) I was inspired to try intermittent fasting… I had been seeing it popping up in my socials for a while, and so I investigated and tuned into my sweet body and asked her if she’d like to give Continue reading

Delicious and Naked

Delicious and Naked

I’m sitting there naked, exposed and in a total space of vulnerability… His foot is in my lap and we have been having a gentle chit chat about random things… you know, plans for the day and weekend, things to do in the coming week, conversations we’ve had with others, possible visitors in the coming months… all while massaging some delicious moisturising coconut based oil into those strong feet of his… Then the next thing I knew I was telling him about a dream I’d had that morning… it was a weird dream that went a little like this…

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Creating Beyond Mr. & Mrs.


Creating beyond Mr and Mrs

It’s been a while since I wrote and I have been super busy creating a whole new way of being and living… I have expanded my businesses to include new classes and processes, become a SeneGence Distributor, now offering Psychic Card Readings with Conscious Facilitation, and have continued to expand upon my facilitating and coaching programs and creating more with my Virtual Admin clients and co-creating with some absolutely brilliantly inspiring people around the globe… And one of the most exciting and challenging areas that I have been playing in over the last year is the area of Creationship with my delicious partner…

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What’s Crafting Possibilities About?

A little of the CP story
So some of you may be wondering how it came to be that a New Zealand born 30ish woman ended up living in Adelaide, South Australia, back in 2010 not knowing anyone and creating a life for herself that has become the best (and most crazy and brave!) choice so far…

Beyond Bullying… What’s Possible?

Beyond Bullying Whats Possible

Choice creates awareness…
What could have been possible if the ones doing the ‘bullying’ actually asked of themselves, “If I do this/say this/message this, what will it create?”
What could have been possible for Libby Bell, the Adelaide teenager who chose to take her own life this week, Continue reading

Creating Beyond ‘The First Blanket’

Beyond the first blanket

So there I was laying on this examination table about to have this 9 inch needle pushed into my belly through to the 11 week old placenta and hopefully dodging the growing foetus… There was this lovely team of women all around me, reassuring me that all was going to be easy today.
“Hmmm I’m sorry Lorene but you have too much fluid in your bladder… can you go empty out half please?”
I think to myself… ‘Are flipping kidding me!?! You want me to only let out half!!!’ Continue reading

What Happened When I Said “Hell NO!” To Relationships…

As you may know already I have not had the easiest run with men in my life… but through it all I have somehow managed to keep positive that next time I will do better…

And now as I sit at home reflecting on many things from the last few months, love, lust, straight up curiosity and a casual flirtation or bonk… I have a huge sense of gratitude for the people who have shown up in my world at the moment… I haven’t just done a bit better than last time… I am actually choosing what makes my heart and body sing in unison!

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Love… The way I got Unscrewed


First of all Id like to get technical for a momentbare with me. Itll all make sense and I promise it wont be the length of an architectural law lecture!

By definition Dictionary of the English language by Samuel Johnson (1768, 3rd edition)
To Love :

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Swimming pools for feet…

16402957_10210174827741567_3244408164498338556_oSince about mid December every morning when I wake up (I even set my alarm earlier so I have time to do this) I acknowledge every part of my body and tell it how grateful I am and how beautiful it is…

This is the first morning I have woken up looked at my feet and without trying went wow! Look at you!! You’re so beautiful!!! I just want to photograph and touch you!!

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A Poem


From The Expanded Space


Deeply into every space

Every part of my body

Being aware of each individual molecule

Every atom vibrating and creating magic.

Hearing the cockatoo

Perceiving their heart beat

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Receiving & Awareness – The fight & struggle to be “normal”


When you receive from someone you don’t have to have them in your world. Physically, as in a face to face touch thing, it’s not a requirement for them to be a part of your life.
I am able to receive from ex-partners,

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2 marriages, and a whole lot of information!

I was having a very frank chat with a friend about narcissistic aresholes and the following was the basis of that chat… after a little nudge from that friend that it would make a great blog! Here you go…

Thanks for the nudge my friend 😉

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An Introduction to Lorene Hughes

Hi there friends….
On the 4th of August 2016 Glenyce Hughes released this video of my contribution to her Greatness Of You Video Series… I was delighted to have been asked to contribute…
How did I get so lucky???? I wonder what else could be created in this beautiful world by us just showing up as us??? 
Here is the link to have a peep at my take on this and also I invite you to subscribe to the series and take a wander through the rest of the amazing videos up there already..

Greatness of You Guest Lorene Hughes


What if wonky words aren’t wrong?

So for the longest time I went into great wrongness around misreading words in sentences. I would go to great pains and slow myself down to double check myself to make sure I fully and totally got it right all the time.. Most recently I am becoming more aware of the quiet little messages “hidden” in those moments.. especially when the sentence still makes sense with the wonky word….
Today’s video is how the word ‘Artistic’ got flipped in my head for ‘Autistic’ and it lead me on a journey of learning a new word and also perceiving an awareness around what potentially happens with spectrum kids and adults! Phew! HDIGABTT???? All from following a whisper of awareness and not making it or myself wrong.. I wonder WEIP?

What Secret Messages Are You Letting Pass You By

Creative life forces…

Did you know that when you create something it takes on a life force of it’s own? My creations that I make and also ones that have been made for me specifically, speak to me. These ones were asking to come and play with you all today… I think they had an ulterior motive the cheeky little babies! hahaha And that’s why I love having them around…
I wonder who many more Inspiration babies I can create this year and beyond?
I wonder what possibilities are available today that I have not yet instituted?

Here’s the link to my video where some of my creations are having their 5 minutes of fame!
Lorene’s Creations come out to play!


So it’s Suicide Prevention Week…. Sept 2016

I wrote a piece today about my story of when suicide first properly touched my world… I made a video to tell it… which is at the bottom for those of you who are in that bubble…

Here it is if you wish to read along too….

So it’s Suicide Prevention Week….

This is a story I have only told a few people due to the criticism and judgement

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